Pour the social cup mindfully
The American writer, Ray Bradbury said, “We are cups, constantly and quietly being filled. The trick is, knowing how to tip ourselves over and let the beautiful stuff out.” Our inner life, our perceptions and rich experiences are delights to other people. Yet if we pour too much of our richness out all at once, it can scare the casual encounter. Our differences and unique configuration of values are alien to many other people. To build a great connection, pour slowly. Let other people show you how much they are ready to accept. Be bold, but not too bold, especially at first.
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Categories: influence, relationships, connections
Tags: leaders in transition Career Impact Coaching Steve Broe
Dear Doctor:
As someone who often made the mistake of pouring too quickly, I must agree with your sound advice. Thankfully after many years, many mistakes and the hurts that went with them, I have learned the art of pouring slowly. I love the image and it will certainly help me maintain my progress on this front.
Cheers to a slow drink.
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Hi Anne,
Thanks for your great observation! I believe that every relationship has a unique alchemy, just like when two chemicals meet, it takes an expert to tell what will be a volatile combination that explodes, and what will mix nicely. Anybody building relationships should pay attention to the depth of disclosure and work at matching the level of the other person. When we choose to push the relationship to a new level, and this boldness is needed at times, the decision should be a conscious risk.
I appreciate your friendship.
SB
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